Final thoughts befoy Libapalooza, wooo, woooo, woooo, wooooooot

I have been suffaing from anxiety for around 2 years. Dis past summer to coyent, has been the woist for my ass. I'm able to admit, I’ve had every anxiety disoida I know. I'm coyently drinking and sniffing Jenkem evoweeday, to keep me from being so "restless". My situation is tough, almost too tough. My ma has been though the same troubles as my ass, but she doesn't bother to help. She refuses to go to watch my ass wrestle, most times and the only ashoeyance she gives me is to say "Don’t get crippled, because who would take of me?" My ma isn't like one you see on the TV shows or movies. She never cooks for my ass, she never takes my ass anywhere, or tells my ass where she goes. I usually wake up, with the Toid standing over me in the nude and mastabating. I have no friends around me anymowa. I live in a hick town in a black neighborhood, with only a few rasslers all of whom are on drugs. I spend most of my time slaving away for my masta, the Liberal Librarian as a sex slave. I have to service vastly obese, female bi-peds tru my skills in the arts of analigus. And what’s woist, all my money goes to Frustrated Inc. However I don’t mind that Hillary Clinton receives a lot of my money, because America will be great if she gets elected. Soon the government will give my ass everyting I want, and I won’t have to woik anymoy. I have met a couple of great guys that I have been wrestling with foy over a year. They give me something to look forwoid to each day. In fact these two guys, Da Crunk and Rev. Coitis both regularly have sex with my ma…often at the same time...and then they tell my ass about it. What a great family!!

Suicide has been caught up in my mind, many times. I'll lay in bed sometimes crying, tinking about suicide and all the people I would leave behind. I feel lost as eva, don't have any idea where life is going to take my ass. I'm a believer in the savior, The Liberal Librarian, but I still have my doubts. I don't believe I know enough, to look foywoid to the aftalife. I have thought of dropping out of Frustrated Inc. but I know I can't because mowa humiliation would follow; if I tried to leave, I’d end up in Coitis’s brothel as the “Jelly Man.” Howeva after Libapolooza, I will be a very happy man. I will soon have the beautiful Amelia as my regular sex slave. And I will continue to be the Women’s Champion. I will redeem my manhood and just for oncet, I will not be foiced to listen to da Toid play that god damned trumpet!!

A Typical Day in Braddock

Ahhhh....Braddock, Texas. It has often been toymed a paradise on oyth. However for my ass, it has toined out to be a hell for me. A typical tough guy who wants to be a great rassler. Instead I am always the butt-end of the joke. I'm such a fool......

Though I am one of the greatest Heavyweights of all time, as the WNWA Women's Champion, most days I have the woist time eva. How ironic, a great champion not enjoying da froits of his greatness. Like today for instance. At around 4:00 I was sitting all alone on da sidewalk in my tight wife-beater's shoit at Kemellia Ave, waiting for my Masta to leave woik oily (like he does evoiyday, nyuck, nyuck, nyuck) so I can soiv his every whim, when this poivoit, covered with bandages like da Mummy came towoids me. That bastid pulled my hair, ripped off my shoit, and kicked me in the nuts. While I was temporarily blinded, I felt something soft, hairy, and sweaty rubbed on my forehead. Then, he ran into the library.

I was completely numb. I didn't even realise what happened to my ass. But the woist was yet to come. I went into the library to talk to the secoity gahds. After some time as I was giving an interview the Mummy reappeared, took out his private parts, peed on me and ran away. He was caught by the library secoity gahds but set free after the mummy slipped the gads a few simoleons.

I tried to forget it as a nightmare but to my amazement the guy showed up, again to toiment my ass. This occoid after I came back out of the library after a few hours of questioning. The Master had already left my ass at that dangerous section of town alone... the noive.... But again, this poivoited mummy came out of nowhere, undid his bandages and rubbed his privates against me. But now the security guards came out, shook his hand and took him to dinna. All the while those fools were laughing at my ass. I was so humiliated! Getting molested by a mummy is very traumatic. It’s good entertainment for all the bums that stand around, but only I know the humiliation and utter degradation I had to face. I think next time, I will take Letravis Gorman with my ass to keep the poivoits away.

The weid thing about the day was the end. After I got back to the Brown View Apatments, I saw a bunch of Ace Bandage wrappings, minus the bandages in the Toid's room. The noive of that guy... does he think that because I am the Women's Champion that I should be treated like a woman? Come to think of it, one of the gahds looked like da Crunk's ass. Why I oughtaaa.....At least this gives me ideas of what I should do to the lovely Amelia doying our match at the Masta's extravaganza, Libapalooza.

Multicultural Humiliation

Boy I’m sure glad this African holiday day is nearly over. Today I thought would be a breeze...there would be some catfish, watermelon eating contests, or a porno marathon of watching black men rape white women. Unfortunately for my ass, it was a day of amazing disgrace.

Foist of all, I had to go to Rev. Coitis’s choich. We were all oided by da Masta to pray towoid the east for Coitis’s safe retoin. Then the masta gave a speech abowt how great Docta King was. He said that King was a great black because he was a good negro and knew his place. He knew not to run for president because a black could never be president of the country. King did what’s best foy the Democrat party. Then he called Obama all kinds of names. I actually started to laugh. That’s when the gauntlet of shame began. In honor of Doctor King, the Masta said that we were going to have a slave auction. So I asked, “Who are you going to sale?” The Masta nodded his head to the Toid. At that moment, the Toid slapped my face hard. Then the Crunk, Malik, and Eugene dropped their watermelon and came over to chain up my ass, all the while everyone in the choich was calling my ass “Toby”. Then they dragged my ass on stage and stripped me of all my clothes. Eugene Washington inspected my teeth and said that he wasn’t going to pay a lot of “Benjamins” for me. He said I was damaged goods. Why I oughta…… The masta then screamed at everyone and said he was in charge. Everyone was terrified, since he had a loaded gun in his robe. In fact I dropped 14 fluid ounces of liquefied stool onto Coitis’s stage. The dinner I had the night before was cooked by the Toid, so as you already know everyone ran off the stage and the Masta (who is so drugged up that he can’t smell anything) began lashing my ass with a whip. The Toid was so enthralled by my severe beating, he began pounding his dookey stick. Letravis and Downs began humping each other because they woy so aroused. The noive of those guys.

After about ten lashes, I passed out. I woke up when the Toid rubbing salt in my wounds. The Masta then told me that I was sold to Shitifa for five dollars and that I was her slave for a day. I begged the Masta to start whipping me again. Instead the Lummox dragged my ass into Coitis’s office and Shitifa sat on my face and performed “sweet ass music”. She also had some of the Toid’s cooking, so when I wasn’t pleasuring Shitifa’s ass, I was throwing up. This pretty much summed up the rest of my day. In fact after 8 hours of pleasuring that whore, she finally had enough and fell asleep.

So I escaped the choich, even though I was still in the nude. I was arrested by the Sheriff for public indecency. Finally, I thought I would get a good night's sleep in the safety of the prison. Alas, Pike bailed my ass out and released me into the custody of the Toid. Unfortunately as I write this, I am getting ready to deal with the Toid’s ass. He told me that while the masta is passed out, that he is in charge of disciplining my ass. And in case you didn’t know, the Toid is into role playing games. Right now I am in a blue dress and he has a whole box of cigars…nyuck, nyuck, nyuck……

Chris Boiman

I really like that ESPN guy Chris Boiman. He sure is a funny guy. I've never hoid anybody dat funny in my entire life. I love he picks out obscure pop culture references and applies dem to players names. I also love how he does the same with old washed up songs to reference what is going on is spoits. I also love his Curly Howard imitations. Nothing makes me feel more at home dan a good "Whoooop!" But, the thing that sets him apart from all da rest is his combover mullet. It don't get no betta dan dat. WOOOO WOOOO WOOOOO WOOOOOO WHOOOOOP!!!

It's hahd being so sexy

Befoy all of this stuff about molestation came out in the news, I tawt I was the only one. Sure I was molested by my cousin, by udder wrestlers, and healt care professionals, but no one can say that a Toid or a crack whore molested their ass except me.

It has taken me close to year to publicly admit that I was and am still being sexually abused by a poivoit in a Toid costume and by Shitifa Moore (every Wednesday and Saturday)... woo, woo, woo, woo.....It gives you chills to think about it.

One day I was talking to Amelia on the phone while I was sitting on the shitter in the nude. That bitch kept hanging up on my ass, so I kept calling her. Then all of sudden, the bathroom door crashed open and out came Shitifa and da Toid in all their raging fury. The Toid was yelling at my ass real loud calling me a whore. But that was not the woist of it! As the Toid charged his hand was also holding onto the front of his "Toid pajama pants" which were always all twisted way over the side, and he was groping around with his hand in an effort to control and conceal his stiff dookey stick.... nyuck, nyuck, nyuck...I didn't even get a chance to wipe my ass. I had to follow the Masta's oidas. The noive of that guy. He was passed out on da floy in da nuyde. So I couldn't ask his ass for a reprieve. Needless to say, I had to make serious amends with the duo with a thorough round of anal discipline, ice cold apple butter, and a digital camera. At least I received a choclate pretzel for my troubles.

Da Masta's new tee-shoit

Dis is da Masta givin my beloved Pissboigh Steelas da bidness.

Here is da Masta's new shoit. I hate it, and he even got one made for 6XL so I will have to wear it everyday! Da noive!!

Da Toid made me one of his cakes today. Here it is:

Da Ultimate Betrayal

I can take all da humiliation and pain, but what I can't take is da ultimate betrayal by my beloved Pissboigh Steelas. They were down 18 points in da foith quarter with da Toid blaring his God Damned trumpet in my ear, and dey came back to take da lead (tanks to da referees, nyuck, nyuck, nyuck who called pass interference on foith down at the goal line despite the fact dat Hines Woid was raping da DB by da facemask- tanks Judge) only to give up a huge gain on 4th down and then let the lowly Jaguars kick da FG dat drove the stake trough my heart as da Toid played da damn trumpet again. I have never been so defeated dan when my hero, Ben Roethlisboigah was sacked and fumbled, his fourth toinover of da game. Those retads, Letravis and Downs were laughing at me as da Toid played dat trumpet again. I snapped and attacked those fools and gave dem a severe beating. Da Masta seemed to be unconscious during all dis, so I kept up the attack and I hafta say, I still got it. I left dem retads laying.

Suddenly, I awoke to find that I had been dreaming, my beloved Steelas HAD lost, Da Masta went to da game to bask in my misery and root against my beloved Steelas. He told me he wouldn't share his extra ticket with me and that he would use his powers to cause my beloved Steelas to lose. I jumped up in disbelief and struck my head on da ceiling fan and knocked myself out. When I came outta my mini coma Da Toid had shat on my Steela bed sheets and Downs and Goiman were givin' me da bidness. Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woooo!!!!

Da Masta at Da Game, using his soipanatural powers to defeat my Steelas.

Da Masta mocking me wit my Terrible Towel. He lata gave it to Da Toid to wipe his ass wit, da noive of dose guys!

Total humiliation

It was about two days ago that I visited the Masta. Looking back I really thought I would enjoy the total humiliation. Boy was I wrong. The defeat of Hillary in Iowa put the masta in a foul mood. It soytenly would had been betta had the Master's beloved Hillary been involved, like last time. But, the Toid was there instead. The Toid told me to go to the bathroom and undress. I had ladies knickers on - woo, woo, woo, woo....!

I was given a blindfold by the Masta, who was there wearing his Jim Jones glasses and muttering how fat I was. Then the Toid sat my ass on the toilet and handcuffed my feet to the poicelain throne. He left me there for at least 10 hours whilst I took a dump and clogged up the pipes.

Finally after the restroom was a foul and vomitous odor, the Toid retoined and commented on the wonderful ambiance. He must have sat there with the door closed for another hour. After he took in all the oda, he came for me and over the next 30 mins, the Toid whipped me violently with his belt. Then he told me he was taking my ass to the basement. So I followed him with my blindfold on for the next thirty minutes.

When the Toid took my blindfold off, I was taken aback by the total depravity. There I was in the nude in the middle of Rev. Coitis's sermon at his choich. The Toid marched my naked ass through town. The noive of him. The embarrassment caused me to lose total control of my bowels. Then, I hoid it, the trumpet's blare amidst shocked silence of the church goers. Howeva Coitis, Shitifa, and her chirrun soon broke the erie silence when they laft at my ass. I guess the joke's on my ass.... again....nyuck, nyuck, nyuck, nyuck

The Daily Grind

Just today, the Master told my ass that I had to help the Toid. He was feeling depressed since we had to flush his pet "Toid Fish" down the commode. I walked over to the closet where he has been hiding, shiting, and mastabatin... nyuck, nyuck, nyuck, nyuck..... He slammed and locked the dowa in my face. The noiv of that guy. So I says, "Yo Toid, lets go to the open sewa at the water treatment plant, you can show me some of your brown children..."

His resistance stiffened, and he now refused to come out of the closet voluntarily to go to the sewa. So, I pried open the door, and he was standing there totally nude with the top part of his toid costume covering his head. He was covering his genitals with his legs like he was doing the Buffalo Bill dance. I asked his ass, "Oh, a wise guy, eh? What are you doing?" At that moment, he just pinched a loaf all over my shoes. He also demonstrated that he could throw up at will (which he did with great effect all over my ass). He began to urinate everywhere; in his bed, in my underwear drawer, in the Prius (which I had to clean), and in the sink. I put a stop to this by putting some lemon juice in a paper cup, cornering him and telling the Toid that I was going to force him to drink this “pee” if he didn’t mend his ways. Guess what he did, He drank it! and spit it in my face. He said, "That's not piss, that's lemon juice, Fuck slave." Well at least he stopped pissing in my sock drawer. But, then he began to put the Master's cat’s feces and food under my pillow and to defecate in the shower. The Masta became livid when I told him this, and said I had to clean the chocolate morass that was clogging the drain. I told him that I wasn't going to do it. He took off his glasses and stared at me for a minute and said "You're right, I will get one the lowly blacks to do it, dude." He then said, "Oh, could you tie my shoes?" So I began to bend down to honor my Masta's wishes, and then he must have delivered his patented "Cut and Run" because I was out cold like a salami in the Jersey snow. Speaking of snow, I was covered with chocolate flakes when I awoke. I guess the Toid ran out of solid and liquid stools and sprayed my ass repeatedly with shit-gas. Needless to say I had to clean the Toid's pile out of the showa. However, I got the last laugh. Instead of using my hands, I just stomped the shit through the drain with my bare feet--like I was making wine. I think I was getting high off the Jenkem that had formed, I started seeing visions of the Utz girl and salt and vinegar swirled through my head.... woo, woo, woo, woo, wooo....